Today it got dark at about 415pm but it was darkening as I drove off the island back to Ellsworth for a job interview. It was 3:30 as I peeled out of the school driveway onto the highway, watching the light rays bend down down down, closer to the ground.

There are still some yellow leaves on the trees and the pine boughs seem to hang extra low as if to say they are tired, too. Everyone is ready for a rest.

We have been here for almost 5 months and it has zipped by; I find it disturbing how fast time passes these days. I suppose the rate only increases with time. I think it’s the rate that makes every moment feel so precious, as if you must satiate yourself and appreciate everything around you at any given moment. Or at least, that’s how I feel.

Last week was the two year anniversary of my Dad’s death and the week before that was the year anniversary of my dear friend, Mary Ann. A little while ago I was standing in the kitchen of the small school I have been assisting since August and she stood behind me telling me get my act together and get out of there. I made the decision, there and then, but it took me another two weeks to actually resign.

Time. Time passing. Time passing quickly. Time passing quickly, so. Time passing quickly, so notice. Time passing quickly so notice everything. Don’t waste time.

I am doing something I have never done before, which is to quit a job without having another one to take its place. I am trusting that it will all work out. Every evening I stare up at the sparkling stars rising on the east side of the house and thank them for buoying me through this, inspiring trust and providing a backdrop of understanding that it will be all right.

Moving across country at almost 43 was really, really hard. Much harder than I had thought. I was used to my rhythms and routines and the expectations of my day. Since coming here, I haven’t been able to find a rhythm or routine just yet but it feels like it might be just around the corner. Here’s hoping.

We bought a house in this little town named Hancock, about 2 seconds from the east border of Ellsworth. I love it, love the house and all its spaces. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and look out the windows and see a sea of stars, sparkling in the darkness. It is so dark here: no streetlights, no people. Just the footprints of deer, some great rooms, some beautiful windows, time to breathe and think: peace.